the week of fives ...

friends, this week i'm over whelmed by just what all God has done for my family,church, friends and even myself. sometimes i wonder am i ever going to make it through "this" - whatever the "this" is. and you know what? yes, i have and yes i will. it's not because i'm anything special, that's for sure! it's because of my very,best friend! He has been there through it all - from the moment i was me.and i love Him with everything that is in me! who is this man? my dad? well, yes i love my earthly father,and he is one of my greatest friends. one thing i love about my daddy here, is that we share this very,best friend. so if it's not my dad,who is it? glad you asked again! God, my Heavenly Father, my creator,strength,help,redeemer,and Savior.

you see, He has never left or forsaked me. He has never even wanted to leave me. He wants me to depend on Him. i have been blessed with some amazing best friends,friends,and a wonderful family that all don't mind if i vent or need them. but they don't ask me to. my parents have always done their best to protect me, but God is always there, and He never sleeps. so yes, He really is always there! even where we don't want Him to be,He is.

this is a very tough week for me as of five years ago. i have mentioned before i would share "the deal" with you. well, i thought i wasn't going to, but the anniversary if you will, is upon me. so i may brief you later on "the deal".

five years ago right this very minute, i was at a funeral for this older lady i went to church with. my dad,who was her pastor and held her funeral, is prone to mis-say things. he tends to get all wrapped up in things and get it all twisted up. it's kind of funny to us; maybe that's wrong of us. it always gave us great conversations and laughs on the way to lunch,at lunch,and on the way home from lunch on sundays because we also knew there would be some from the evening service to laugh about at supper. poor dad. and while i'm on it, my dad would HATE to know i #1  i blog,#2 that he's talked about on it. if he would only read it, maybe he wouldn't ; ) oh well ... back to my point.... my dad still preaches,he's not pastoring so we don't get those weekly laughs. so what do we do? laugh at the really memorable ones.  well, five years ago he had a major slip up, one that should make an email about ways preachers get things all messed up! he said,"it was our pleasure to see ms sister suffer and pass on to her Heavenly home." yes, i firmly believe that dear lady is at home with her Savior, but it wasn't a pleasure to see her suffer and pass on. my dad knows it wasn't either. he simply got all tongue tied and it was funny, and her family finally got a laugh.

so what does this lady's funeral have to do with "the deal"? you see, five years ago today i didn't know that that would be one of the last times that my life was "easy".  it's been five years (as of late january) that i graduated from cosmetology school and started my full time career. my life was changing so much five years ago, and i thought wow! this is going to be fun! in part of my mind, i was still a kid. i wasn't a grown up yet. close though, i was just a few months from turning 20. i had always been given responsiblities by my parents; i wasn't someone who never had to do anything. i was spoiled in some ways, but never had life on a silver platter,nor would i want to. i thought my life was easy, and that one day soon, now that "college" was over for me and i was about to be 20 that happily ever after was right around the corner. i was somewhat wrong. five years ago today, i thought i had a good church family,family and friends. i was missing friends from high school and didn't know how to get in touch with some of them. i started feeling alone. i also remember looking down that chapel to the pulpit where my dad was preaching,and realized i had missed so much by being worried what i looked like at  church,what song i could belt my lungs out on, and frankly had taken the fact that my dad was a preacher that i didn't need to do my part.yes, i prayed. funny thing about my prayers then. i always thought they would be answered. always expected them to be answered. i expected God to do marvelous things,and He did. i also realized i was usually telling God what i needed to be done,and i never talked to Him. i always asked questions and told Him what i needed Him to do. never gave thanks. praying was a formality really. i realized how undeserving i was of EVERYTHING! then. God had been revealing Himself to me for a few months then,and i kept wondering why? was something terrible about to happen to me? there were so many questions, so i started seeking Him more. i'm not perfect now,no! please don't think me self-righteous! i'm just a sinner saved by grace through faith! that day, five long yet fast years ago, i never knew that that could have possibly been the last time i saw/heard my father preach.

it wasn't,thankfully. and it's ALL because of God's merciful grace and love!

this week, i hope that i have the time,strength,and courage to keep sharing about "the deal" and the amazing way God changed my life starting five years ago.

on a lighter note,
i hope your weekend has been a beautiful one! i worked for 8+ hours straight (loved every moment and especially with the changes my clients wanted! i love spicing it up! come on spring and fresh colors!) and then had a Sunday School Teaching Training for 3 hours yesterday. so basically i left home at 7:20 and got home at like 930.yes, i was tired. so i curled up and watched part of "the proposal". now, after a wonderful service at church this morning i'm feeling a little sickly. yuck-o! i'm hoping my meds will kick in soon and i can make it back for tonight's service! i think im going to rest some now. afterall, God rested.

With an over whelmed and thankful heart,
Britt