4 1/2 months later ...

i'm going to attempt to post again ... i have two already started, but i can tell they're me needing to vent and don't need to be broad casted to anyone else ...

so, wow! time has flown! it's almost mid-september!

lately, i have been feeling like i'm in  a stand still. i feel like every one is getting married, buying a home, or having a baby (ies). it's not helping matters that some friends are already on baby #2. i love my job, love selling jewelry (even though i'm not staying super busy with it), love my family - especially my nephews, but i feel like nothing is changing with me.

i don't mean to be selfish, but sometimes i think we should focus on ourselves. who else is??? i also would like for God to let me in on if i'm going to be single the rest of my life or not. i know that's not how HE works, but boy oh boy! it would be nice to know so i could try to "help" HIM plan my life. maybe if i knew that info i wouldn't have the feelings i do now, or maybe it would make it worse. i'm trying to grasp on the idea of what fun would it be if i knew God's total plan for me - it wouldn't be fun b/c i wouldn't get the lessons and blessings daily that HE alone gives.

have you ever felt that way? like nothing you did was good enough because you're not where you thought you were going to be?

more to come ...